我喜欢站在大门前看着散布整个天空的乌云。还有那一阵阵低沉的雷声，好像乌云在嘀咕什么。暴风雨来袭前，空气总会特别闷热。但也正因为如此，我更期待暴风雨的到来。越大越好。尘世有太多需要被稀释的东西。
This CNY, I realised many things. I realised I have always envied families who go out as a whole for CNY visiting, or those who invite many relatives and friends over. I realised I am very afraid of the coming of CNY because CNY simply means watching movies and slacking at home for me. I love to watch movies, there is no doubt about that. Perhaps I just don't appreciate the latter because there is so much to face head-on. I hate the silence or otherwise awful hurlings at the dining table. I hate how I need to pretend to be hospitable to people I dislike. This year, I hid in my room when people I did not feel comfortable with came, then I was accused of being stubborn and impolite. Sometimes I really wonder if being myself is of imperative or being polite is. Whichever the case, I want to confess that I really feel tired and unhappy this CNY. The worst is that I feel that no one can understand because everyone I tried to rant this to tells me I should go home because it is CNY after...
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