past.

Firstly, I just want to say: Brenda and Hui Ying, if you are reading this, CHEERIOS. TAKE CARE. :) The guitar concert almost hypnotized me but towards the end was really engaging. Fel was cute and she played well. Finale was as usual awesome and somewhat touching. Finally a swim with Zhi Zi Rui and Max again but the session was short because we were all lazy. Yet, we never fail to gossip about everything under the sun each time we swim. It is just quite hard to be true. I don't know. I haven't achieved it and am not anywhere near. It is certainly a tiring thing to put up a false front in front of almost everyone, including my family, including my closest clique. I don't know if they are the ones who disappoint me or I'm the one who disappoint myself. Yes, perhaps I'm cynical. It's not that I don't want to change my perspective, my mindset, my pessimistic attitude towards life. It's not that I want to 'think so much'. It's just not something w...

The harmonica concert Angie and Zi Rui had always looked forward to has finally come to a beautiful closure last night. I think Angie and Zi Rui both did great! :) My Angie was so shuai and my Zi Rui was an awesome actor (except I pity the lead actress who had to hold Zi Rui's sweaty hands)! I hate to be compelled to do something I already claimed I don't like. Promises mean a lot but once they are broken, they mean nothing, at all. It's been a tiring, vexing and busy week. I can't wait for the June holidays. Now, some pictures taken last night. No captions.

Max, 我已经低声下气地跟你道歉了。 I really didn't know you were absent for 3 days. And apparently you're just making matters worse by thinking in a negative way. I really sent the message IMMEDIATELY after you hung up. If you received it 10 minutes later, then the problem must lie in the connection and not that I'm lying. Believe it or not, it's up to you. There isn't even a reason for me to lie to you. Put yourself in my shoes and I'm sure you can't think of any reason for me to lie too. If an apology is what you're waiting for, then I'M SORRY. TAKE CARE.

Can you tell me to cheer up Can you tell me to stay strong Can you tell me I'm stronger than this Can you tell me I'll pull through Can you tell me I got to get over this Can you tell me you have faith in me Can you be there for me now as promised I'm not happy. Do you hear me

HAPPY BIRTHDAY XIAOBAI. :) Argh. I don't like my day. Tiring and stressful and racing heartbeats. Last night's alumni meeting was not on time and almost pointless. Super awkwardness between Mr. Tan and me but I couldn't do anything. Congrats to Joe and Darren for their new responsibilities! :) Couldn't meet bestie AGAIN. Okay I don't want to elaborate. I don't like school today. I don't like I don't like I don't like! Went to IMM to help Joe find his stuff. Daiso doesn't sell it anymore! I made a wasted trip. Okay, maybe not. I bought a Doraemon keychain. But it was quite expensive for a tiny keychain like that. I saw the Doraemon watch like finally! $99.90. The cost's as beautiful as the watch itself. I couldn't find the thing I'm looking for till now. Time is running out. :( So anyway, I was so worried I couldn't find Joe's stuff as I've promised so I walked at a velocity of 100m/s (that's crazy) to JE and combed th...

Just hung up. Chatted with bestie. For 25.00 minutes. Man, that's our lousiest record. For the third time, again, he had to hang up because he needed to talk to his girlfriend. Oh well, understandable. Nevertheless, I'm still happy he called. Haven't chatted for a long, long time. Still miss "Withheld calling" on my mobile at late nights, and keeping silent over the line yet can feel a best friend's presence. :) We haven't met up for 3 months and 2 days! You see, your call reminded me of the good old days again. (Don't you dare read this entry to me over the phone when you next call me!)

We come from humble beginnings and Who could have guessed it when You sit and doubt it and Things ain't all that bright But we made it through the night It's like a game of truth or dare If you can make it here You'll make it anywhere That's what we've been told But the stories getting old Together we faced the cold outside No one can say we didn't try And I will never give you up or let you go Together we faced our final fears Remember the moments that we shared That's why I'll never give you up or let you go We'll be ready when the curtain might fall Feel my heart beating when the crowd calls I gotta read between the lines Cuz I'm living out the script of my life Cuz we all got a part we must play And I've done it but I've done it my way I gotta read between the lines In the script of my life We started out many years ago No one will ever know How far we've really come Since we walked away And no more words to say And we made a lot ...

A very complete week. :) At the start of this week, I kept harping on the assumption that Speech Day would be super lonely for me this year because seemingly nobody really wanted to go back. I was so wrong! I'm glad I was. I have had the latest complete 8 ladies picture now! That's the best thing that's happened this week and I so so so so love the 8 ladies. They really never fail to make my day. :) Thank goodness I took the initiative to ask Hui Min if she wanted to come down. Was contemplating earlier on because I thought she probably would not join us, considering there was some awkwardness at Esther's CNY steamboat two months back. Luckily I still asked! :D The last time the trio took a picture together was in 2004! With muscular Shawn. The always-so-noisy! Dear Hui Xin. ZhengNing! The guy I like d for 2 years. :D Sheena and his/her gf. :) Darlings. I like these! You can tell how heavy Sheena is, from my excruciating expression, that is. Lovely 7/8 ladies. :) Had a...

The bad things will go. I waited quite long for them to. This test of endurance and perseverance was certainly a challenging one. Yet, I think I'm thankful life put me through this, because I think I'm a little stronger than yesterday, again. :) This year's NAPFA results(excluding 2.4) were probably the best I've ever obtained. -I passed my SBJ! But was an ugly E. Definitely must go for a retake. -Brenda sat on me before my sit and reach. Managed to reach a 40 unlike the lousy 30 I used to get. :) -Whole class girls were looking at me do pull ups and rooting for me as I did. I did 30! I think the last time I hit more than 20 was P5 when I did 38. -Sit ups taken on Monday and managed to get an A because of Zhi's encouragement. :) -Shuttle run was a C but feel like retaking too! The thought of 2.4 gives me the shivers. But I must break my past lousy records! Man, my arms are aching so badly after today's pull ups! Math test was NOT a breeze but manageable. Please,...

No Monday blues. :) I love yellow. And I have Monday yellows today! I'm a happy woman today. Don't ask me why. Don't ask me what happened. All the good things just came and stayed lucid in my mind! Yangce and Zhi loved my honey lemon drink. Went to school with Darren. I'm hooked to a new found song. Everything's significant enough to make me feel contented. Haven't had dinner at 109 with family for a long, long time. A filling one! Fish head curry my fave! And a basket filled with sweets, snacks, drinks! I love Mother. :) After like 13 days?! Man, I'm going gaga again. Thank you to everyone who brought me laughter today. :) I KNOW IT'S NOT THE END.

I've got aching legs now. Like 7 hours of walking. It was no joke please. Believe it or not, Max joined us. Man, I can't believe it myself! But it was definitely not an illusion. It was so real. YES, MAX JOINED US AT AMK HUB AND COASTWAY POINT -- THE OTHER SIDE OF SINGAPORE, NOT THE WEST SIDE. Zhi and I combed almost every 'toy' shop we came across. Mini Toons Action City More Than Words Kiddy Palace. No fate. Just no fate. Yet, I'm still so so so broke after today's futile shopping. 10 bucks! I've got only 10 bucks left in my wallet! This amount is so much less than the price of my wallet please! Thank goodness I'm getting my pay tomorrow. :D Sad. I so loved the jacket that was on special offer but guilt overwhelmed me when I was contemplating to buy or not to. Resolved the conflict over lunch. World War III has come to an end. Sweet. What an interesting day. But hey, that's not all. I got pranked! I want to elaborate but I don't know how to...

MELISSA. ♥ says: okay i give up trying to post comment MELISSA. ♥ says: i tell you here, you can post it up for me when you write your next entry! MELISSA. ♥ says: OMG I'M NOT SI BIAN TAI! but guolian, i love you deep deep for not posting up funny pictures! thank you! (: Melissa's directing at Tuesday's entry on the soccer match, rather, the picture she took with Warrick. Admit it. You're 死变态!

My nose's again like a running tap. Phlegm's accumulating in my throat too. Therefore, I played truant again. I'm glad I did. The pain of seeing my PW grade with my own eyes is too hard to bear. I'm not being ambitious. I just think I deserve something better. I did so much, I did the most. Everyone (except Ms Chiew perhaps) has eyes to see. Yet, we end up with the same grade. Well, for a fact though, I'm not too saddened by it. Zhi helped me order Royal Battle Of Wit VCDs, the drama serial I watched when I was 6. There was no replay since then and couldn't find it on the net. Finally I got to watch again and tada! I finished watching within 2 days. Next, I'm waiting for Wen Ting's return to China so that she can get me my TVB serials. :D BUT, I'm definitely going to resist my temptation to watch before A's. :) I JUST WANT TO BE THERE TO SHARE YOUR PAIN.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YELAY. :) AC VS RJ was good game! Number 7 and Number 10 are lovely! Of course! They're Warrick and Malcolm. :D Please, I haven't gotten this high for ages. Except I really wasn't as insane as Melissa. She went gaga over the vice captain that she didn't want to wash her hair because he touched it, she didn't want to wash her right hand because she touched his hair too, she didn't want to brush her teeth because she inhaled the CO2 he exhaled! And, SHE HELPED HIM PAY THE MONEY HE OWED ME. chew chew if you're reading this, please, it's time you spank your daughter. :) My throat's dying on me again. It dropped a hint to warn me not to go for Yelay's bbq. So I had to be good girl and head for home. See, Melissa and I missed another opportunity to see AC vice-captain! (Melissa I know you blame me!) I hope I'll be too sick for school tomorrow. Warrick aka Number 11! :) My third picture with him! How many girls out there are dying to ...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DUNCAN. :D Chris drew me this when I was Sec 3 I think. But I actually lost the original portrait. Many probably think I no longer like Blue! Nope, I'm just keeping them in my memory and I still keep their albums and listen to their songs. I remember how I started liking them! And the concert I so regretted missing on 24 September 2004. Disbanding doesn't mean they won't make a comeback. Chances are low but I'm still waiting! :) What happened to everyone today? Zhi shouted like some mad woman in class early this morning at the sight of Rui En on the cover of i. Siao. Brenda's lao da (Tzer Jing) suddenly asked me why I didn't scan GP answers for her. ??? I was nothing but stunned. My sis willingly stayed home today to help clear up the mess in the house. Mother thought she was down with fever. I passed my standing board jump(trial) for once! Gosh I can't believe this. What on earth happened to my legs. Brenda (sorry I thought I must remember th...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIN HUI. :) As I tried to redo the block test paper, I realised I could have fared a few times better if I had been less careless and more focused. The Bleeding Love song kept playing in my mind while I was scribbling during that two long hours. All the equations and formulae vanished. Darn it. Right, I'll make it a point never to listen to that song before any test. I'm still not getting over the fact that I failed. But I'm still asking myself to move on. I just need some time to hear myself. :) It's a Sunday. And Monday's coming. A new week, and new challenges follow. It's time I stop dithering and go straight towards my goal. I MISS YOU.

Xuan's so into the fashion industry. I gasped when I entered the site. http://www.xanga.com/thescarletdress I miss this girl. Haven't met up for nearly a year? Went for a swim and steambath today and it sure was a good avenue for stress relieving. Not just that, cheap + fats-shedding. It's a life's luxury and I haven't enjoyed anything this great for a long time. Managed to sort things out with Zhi I guess. At least I have confessed maybe 80% of what I was able to articulate with words. Max wasn't home today. There goes my chance of explaining. Almost everyone's asking me for an explanation nowadays. To be frank, I don't see the need. Yet, like everyone around sees it as a responsibility. So, I can only do as told. There's only ONE set of homework this weekend. Nothing can get better than this. I'm going to cherish this wonderful weekend by sleeping it away. Sleep is precious. Sleep is hard to resist. Sleep is the most important thing I got to do...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YVONNE. Friend for 11 years! Back to normal mode but things have still changed somehow. I don't want to end up feeling worn out digging out the past so that's that. It's been a hectic week, I thought. And a depressing one too, with the second failed Math test of my life. I've grumbled, I've teared, I've plunged into The Great Depression, and I've moved on. Traumatising week too. Yiting treated me to Peel Fresh orange juice. And then she said hello and bye to me so randomly. Jasmine called my name and said hi. But none was instigated by Brenda. Hui Ying perhaps! Anyone with a weak heart could probably die from those. Fridays are always the most satisfying. Lunch with the 4 ladies. They made my day. And I love them. :) Sheena tried to be 'blockbuster' but apparently she wasn't SiNi's opponent. Shall not upload her picture or she shall confront me for that. :) Sheena, see? I'm so nice to you. I said I'd put it up on the wo...