past.

1. she is crying. 2. she is replaying the tracks jiekou and thereason. 3. she is reminiscing. 4. she walked away after passing the card. 5. her heart shattered. 6. but nobody knew. 7. it's been one year and more. 8. she feels painful. 9. she had the last guides meeting today. 10. she handed over the PL rank. 11. she's probably the lousiest PL who'd lose her world badge at the last meeting. 12. and the one who hit the tray in qimei's hands while marching in. 13. is it true that everyone will learn something new everyday? 14. then she really learnt something new today. 15. that she loves guides. 16. she misses the guiding days, and the 7 leaders. 17. she had the last dinner in full u with them today. 18. she loves mel, jiahui, nic, sther, sheena, sini and huimin. 19. she finds it hard to move on. 20. if there's really a definition for moving on. 21. she was dumb yesterday. 22. she thought of ending her life. stupid. she's stupid.

Lovers drown or drift away. The colours fade and turn to grey. I draw the line and face the fact, that we don't want to be like that. Because we don't want to be like that. You're one thing that's worth while fighting for. And I just can't let you go. spent hours with sheena . should i buy duncan's album or simon's?! goodness. this is madness. I WANT THEM!!! what to do to alleviate the pain in me. is there anything that you very much would want to do, but you know you can't? inside, she's loving him still, after all this time.

You seem to find the dark when everything is bright. You look for all that's wrong instead of all that's right. Does it feel good to you to rain on my parade? You never say a word unless it's to complain. It's driving me insane. If i were you, holding the world right in my hands, the first thing i'd do is thank the stars for all that i have. Look at what's around you now. More than you ever dreamed. Have you forgotten how just hard it used to be? So what's it going to take for you to realize, that all could go away in one blink of an eye. It happens all the time. shopping craze yesterday. the 4 girls freaked me out. known as wenshi , siewfang , wenyan , shien . hahah. finally had my tuition. so fufilling and gained my sense of accomplishment! (; in my heart, he shall always live. (:

It's been a long and winding journey. But i'm finally here tonight picking up the pieces walking back into the light. Into the sunset of your glory where my heart and future lies. There's nothing like that feeling when i look into your eyes. when's the last time i got last in class? sec1. history, 4/25. this shall be the second, and worse results. i think i can see disappointment in mr. chiang's eyes.

I don't mind spending some time just hanging here with you. Because i don't find too many guys that treat me like you do. Those other guys i want to take me for a ride, but when I walk they talk of suicide. Some people never get beyond their stupid pride. But you can see the real me inside and I'm satisfied. But i know that's not what you want if tomorrow the world ends. i don't like that treatment. but i have no one to blame, for i was being sickening. so, another mistake for the day. =/ 250ml of raspberry ripple icecream. this is horrendous. nothing makes sense anymore, i want you back in my life.

You say, you've got all you'd ever want. Then how come you're demanding everything, a little more from everyone. You're always turning all my rights to wrongs, with the bitter words you're whispering. I see we've come undone, well, there's something wrong about it. Your life's too overcrowded. I'm tired of giving it all. And taking the fall, i guess. shall not see me for these days because I MUST REVISE! probably will come back when i don't feel that sinful anymore. so, am i sinful right now? aha. =xx a trip to the art museum today. ain't boring, but not interesting either. nic and i almost lost our way! shopped at marina sq with my fellow girls. but without my jiahui and sheena ): hmm. had a nice talk with stheng yesterday. indeed, the problem with humans is that they think too much. because we have food to eat, water to drink, clothes to wear and shelter for protection. if we have to struggle for our lives, would we still think so muc...

Sometimes life can be a burden. Try to stay one step ahead. I feel the world upon my shoulder each time i'm standing out on the edge. And my hopes have all deserted me, like they washed away in the sand. And it's hurting my pride. Try to survive, but i know i stand a chance. fruitful day with mel ! 4.5h of work and 1.5h of exercise! dinner was sumptuous too! yummies! =p if only every single day was this wonderful. aha. hypothetically indulged again. good game with mel ! (; stayed over at cousins'. my dear cuties ! =D don't talk to me about world cup. i'm no longer that interested. perhaps the last match, if BRAZIL is in. =D

Welcome to the club of broken hearts, where a thousand lonely souls have passed. Sooner or later, you're gonna wake up and find what your looking for, like a diamond washed up on the shore. In the meantime you're feeling like you're lost without a friend. Sooner or later, you're gonna love again. Love has left you rejected. You put up your defences. Now your heart's been trying to test it. nothing's working, nothing's helping. one thing i know, i'm tearing apart. but it's not as if anyone can save me from this. i am my saviour.

We don't even talk any more. We don't even know what we argue about. Don't even say 'I love you' no more. Because saying how we feel is no longer allowed. Some people work things out. And some just don't know how to change. Now they can see the tears in our eyes. But we deny the pain that lies deep in our hearts. Well maybe that's pain we can't hide. Because everybody knows that we're both torn apart. Why do we hurt each other? Why do we push love away? 3 hours of BLUE. oh dear, how HOT! hahah. i could actually walk past without lifting my head. lol. what's this world coming to? i have no idea about the formality.

After all the broken stones, that were thrown, for no good reason, inside, she is loving him still after all this time. And though her heart bears the scars, no sign of healing, it's all right. She's loving him still, after all this time. shopping with sther was great! :D we went gaga over so many things. aha! so many YELLOW things! but we came across something that i never ever experienced. the driver actually declined us when we boarded the cab! what the?! well, busing was enjoyable though(; another 2 weeks and i guess i shall succeed.

He's more than a man And this is more than love The reason that the sky is blue The clouds are rolling in Because I'm gone again And to him I just can't be true i know i have found my first best friend(: even if it's just going to be one short day of 24 hours, i shall always remember. a bonding so strong. my migraine's killing me.

Watched my life pass me by in the rearview mirror. Pictures frozen in time are becoming clearer. I don't want to waste another day, stuck in the shadow of my mistakes. life is ugly, very ugly. if only i was blind, deaf, mute. that's pessimism. the sky is dark enough without you having to wear shades. if we were afraid of being hurt and humiliated, we would never love anyone.

nah, there ain't a difference between letting go and not letting go. you're just another guy, aren't you? Forgive me my weakness but I don't know why. Without you it's hard to survive.

baby that is why, there can be no goodbyes. alleviate the pain in me and i'll be grateful to you. no morphines, please. cause' that won't work. you can't explain why the heart chose to love who it loved.

chem prac was kinda a disaster. half a beaker of the just-heated solution just spilled over my hand. and to think i actually went into a daze for 1 minute before i reacted. hahaha. gosh, i'm forgetting how you look like.