past.

kinda screwed for oral. but lovely i have to say, it's over. shan't niam about it. ;D missing guides ! and i'm passing out in eight days' time. ): oh well, i have seen that coming. do i have a friend now or what? mr. chiang told me not to drop higher chinese. ha. a song that reminds me of a guy who really broke my heart.

everyone around me seems to be on a mood scale of 1-3. that's really bad. me? today isn't a bad day out, neither a good one. just feel numb to things around me. people around are like walking far ahead of me. and i'm still strolling, that i have no idea of the changes. love you all people, those i have kept in my heart. slacking's my forte.

we are to clock 8 hours a day when i was dismissed at 5pm today. guess what that means.

how on earth can i fight the battle when i'm slacking away like this?

i want to slap him, really really hard. for causing pain to my soul, making my life suck so much. you have had my consent, because i was too useless, too weak. it's okay. i will learn to keep my fear and share my courage. i am going to leave you with no rights to mess up my life. been obsessed. uber. lucid images flashing in my mind. indeed, my intelligence has been used the wrong way, according to kwan. my love for you, there's a limit.

a minute ago, my mind was all about death. everything's cleared. thank god, really. i wished i could make you promise me you would always be safe and sound. last guides meeting. ain't that nice. but guess i was the one who didn't bother to engage. nice time i had with mel at big bookshop. that evil woman. =xx nah, we laughed like crazy aunties. gosh. i found DUNCAN 's official site. how can he be so hot?! goodness. i'm exposed to the sun again, melting in a second. if the devil is going to point his fork at me and ask me to choose who bids goodbye first, i will say it's me. i mean, duh. really, i can't stand the pain of losing you, maybe for ten seconds, but not more than that.

How the hell'd we wind up like this And why weren't we able To see the signs that we missed And try to turn the tables I wish you'd unclench your fists And unpack your suitcase Lately there's been too much of this But don't think it's too late Nothing's wrong Just as long as you know that someday I will Someday, somehow I'm gonna make it alright But not right now I know you're wondering when You're the only one who knows that Someday, somehow I'm gonna make it alright But not right now I know you're wondering when Well I'd hope that since we're here anyway That we could end up saying Things we've always needed to say So we could end up staying Now the story's played out like this Just like a paperback novel Let's rewrite an ending that fits Instead of a Hollywood horror love hurts, indeed. if i'm a fucker, what are you? ha, look who's talking.

we seem to be manipulated by life when we are supposed to manipulate our own lives. not that i have to do . but i want to do. really? who knows. life's unpredictable and contradicting. i know i'm not trying my best. and i don't know what to do to keep myself going. studied today. not a fruitful one. well at least this is the first sunday i spent studying with my friends after so long. what's next? probably yet another lonely sunday. hypocrites are everwhere, and i'm merely among the crowd. i think i'm in love with you.haha.lol.

Everybody's talking But they don't say a thing They look at me with sad eyes But I don't want their sympathy It's cool you didn't want me Sometimes you can't go back By why'd you have to go And make a mess like that Well I just have say, before I let go Have you ever been low Have you ever had a friend that let you down so When the truth came out Were you the last to know Were you left out in the cold Cause what you did was low No, I don't need your number There's nothing left to say 'Cept I never thought It'd hurt this much to be saved My friends are outside waiting I've gotta go I walk out of this darkness With no sense of regret And I go with a clear conscience We both know that you can't say that This to show, for all the time I loved you so, so i did not see this coming. this song was probably written for someone who felt the same way as i did. this happens all the time, i have no idea why. why do you lie to me each time i starte...

i miss guides. lol. coh just now. but kinda a bad experience. certain things are just unpleasant to the ears. still, i miss guides. i dislike to be sec4. kelly's hot! walkaway(: a stupid girl who lost 2 hours waiting for someone who didn't know of her existence.

it's like what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck and, what the fuck. when you're fucked up, that's it. it's not always possible to handle things rationally without putting in emotions. i'm still humane. unrequitedlove? not for me, anymore.

partayyed at max 's house! birthday boy! =D l o v e l y bubbles! hilarious. when we met at the taxi stand, everyone wore either black or white . only zirui and i wore orange ! hahaha. throat was really bad earlier. but thanks to max 's SUPER STRONG STREPSIL ! really worked! yummies! =pp their bbq skills totally rocked! and it was great feeding them! hahaha. watched honesty . great show! funny thing was, we watched until super engrossed then the vcd stopped. because we had to play the second vcd. but the vcd went missing!!! kinmun and i combed the drawers in the living room! in the end max found it in the room we watched the show -.- hahahah. nice nice! =D this is one of the few parties i really enjoyed!(: lovelyholiday! my dear JIAHUI! thanks for your honey lemon! love ya!(:

a very strong urge to blog yesterday. but didn't. then today, like nothing much to say. oh ya, i'm a selfish friend.

screwedscrewedscrewed. but it's over!(: wonderful c.lit lesson. with all the laughter that filled the lab. and, i actually didn't nod off to sleep during physics! =xx oh ya! forgot to say about last friday. 1. tecky talked to me and he smiled!(: 2. finally an individual neoprint with jiahui !(: chatted up someone last night. the one i had a crush on when i was 10! haha. 3 years okay!! =xxx guolian's off to study! it's been a year. ha. wow?

third entry of the day. feeling of contempt and sadness engulfed me the entire day. sadness lingers. any form of sadness a 16-year-old teen feels, when she senses no love in the air. very painful. it's not possible for me to like him that long. never.

the last chapter. i want to cry can. the kiss in the rain. that's a girl. forever indulged in her own fantasy.

chinese lesson for 4.5 hours yesterday. scolded by mdm ang thrice! haha. but felt kinda 'fresh' instead of guilty. =xx cause' i really enjoy xiaobai and gang's company! =D tried out the new neoprint machine in je with jiahui ! nice! met the super late zhuangwei and we went to the last rally! impressive crowd okies! totally omgness! took 156 home. so so so long. but had a long chat with jiahui ! kinda relaxed day for me!(:

mdm ang treated pizzahut! =D filling meal indeed. yummies. mel asked me a very difficult question. "what makes you happy?" goodness. i can't answer that. still thinking. =/ alrighty. time i get indulged in my joecheng 's fantasy again! i'm so in love with him! the distance is getting further. it feels as if you're running ahead of me, and i can never catch up.

election's perking me up! but gotta miss the rally tonight. cause' i have not done my work. =xx so many wonderful memories.