hot.

I was telling J last week that I would refrain from Starbucks because I had to save up for my trip. Here I am again, sitting here with my soyed latte, missing the 9pm drama because this season does not interest me that much. In my memory, this has been the longest that I haven't touched the drink since I got hooked. It was not really an addiction after all. More like an elixir, considering the frequency I consume it whenever life crumbles. I thought I needed it again. The feeling just has to return when I thought I was slowly getting better. And clearly that is no one's problem. It's me. It's vulnerability. I told Lane I was in a dilemma, whether to have my drink hot or cold. Always hot, she said. And so for the very first time I had my soyed latte hot. The taste does differ. It is bitter. Uncanny. Seemingly it helps better in healing. Is that why medicine is always awful tasting? While queueing I looked around and saw a few people drinking the same drink. Did they need to heal too? I am sure, I am not the only one in this plight. Maybe, just maybe, knowing that there is a 'paining' community does help to lessen the pain that minute bit. I am waiting for a friend now. And from the fear of waiting, I know I would prefer being on my own. Honestly, this is pain.

If I had to fall in love again, I wished I would love myself. I would spare myself all these, like how I would never allow the one I love suffer all the pain and heartaches.

By the way, the con of having a hot latte as an elixir is that it turns cold very quickly. Mine has.
My mum says medicine proves less effective when it is consumed cool.