The last time Z and I watched Star Awards together was 2011, where both AhWU and Ruien received The Best Actor and Best Actress Award respectively. I stayed over at her place and we discussed about the awards till we dozed off with me on the lower deck and her on the top. Three years later both our favourite people did not get the same awards. But we were happy that Rebecca and Chen Liping bagged their deserving trophies. I was exceptionally happy for Rebecca because I have always felt she is a rising star. We did not discuss about the awards this time. Maybe we are grownups now. We talked about friends, about people, about life. Then Z dozed off. She always does first. It took me at least another half an hour to get to lala land for I was thinking about AhWU's words.
We shared a plate of salad for breakfast. It was pretty good and definitely healthy. The only reason why I would like JEM is because of M&S. So I naturally and happily got my guilt-free (but at the rate I am eating 'guilt-free' is far too self-delusional) salted pretzels coated with milk chocolate. Too hard to resist, really. It is so big a pity a packet only has 5 bags of pretzels. And then we had another round at H&M. There you have it. It was Monday late morning. We had the taitai tea, shopping, small chats. Life could not be better. On the way up to Saladworks, Z smacked me on my shoulder and remarked, "Thank goodness you are strong enough. Some people would have wasted their lives away." Have I not wasted my life enough? Probably the longest period of wallowing in self pity for me. But I am really appreciative of this friend, who may be happily attached recently but still cares for and listens to me. These are true words from the bottom of my heart.
It has been... nearly 8 months? E finally asked to meet. We had a simple lunch, which I was already grateful for. From the experiences he shared, I think I discovered how long we had not caught up with each other. One thing that never changes about him, is he insists that as long as I am happy anything else is fine. Deep down I actually felt a little touched because I like how that X-factor in the E I have known for years is still intact. We do not laugh so much like before. Maybe we are grownups now. But I am glad he still thinks of me.
Student was at his worst behaviour. I stomped out of his house. That used to be something I thought I would never have to resort to. Apparently, the time was not ripe yet. But really, after stepping out of his house, I was fine. There was simply no need to bring the anger along with me after I left the place. For once, I cooked myself a decent meal because I thought I deserved some good dinner after having slogged so hard for the past few days.
Is this loving oneself and loving life? I don't really know how to define those. All I know is I try to do anything that puts me at ease or makes me good these days, including walking an extra distance to snap a picture today. I don't want to think about matters that upset me, care about people who hurt me, and hold on so dearly to the things that will eventually leave me.
I just want to find some time soon, sit down on a couch and read a book while I enjoy my chocolate pretzels with a scorching hot soyabean drink that is 75% sweetened.
We shared a plate of salad for breakfast. It was pretty good and definitely healthy. The only reason why I would like JEM is because of M&S. So I naturally and happily got my guilt-free (but at the rate I am eating 'guilt-free' is far too self-delusional) salted pretzels coated with milk chocolate. Too hard to resist, really. It is so big a pity a packet only has 5 bags of pretzels. And then we had another round at H&M. There you have it. It was Monday late morning. We had the taitai tea, shopping, small chats. Life could not be better. On the way up to Saladworks, Z smacked me on my shoulder and remarked, "Thank goodness you are strong enough. Some people would have wasted their lives away." Have I not wasted my life enough? Probably the longest period of wallowing in self pity for me. But I am really appreciative of this friend, who may be happily attached recently but still cares for and listens to me. These are true words from the bottom of my heart.
It has been... nearly 8 months? E finally asked to meet. We had a simple lunch, which I was already grateful for. From the experiences he shared, I think I discovered how long we had not caught up with each other. One thing that never changes about him, is he insists that as long as I am happy anything else is fine. Deep down I actually felt a little touched because I like how that X-factor in the E I have known for years is still intact. We do not laugh so much like before. Maybe we are grownups now. But I am glad he still thinks of me.
Student was at his worst behaviour. I stomped out of his house. That used to be something I thought I would never have to resort to. Apparently, the time was not ripe yet. But really, after stepping out of his house, I was fine. There was simply no need to bring the anger along with me after I left the place. For once, I cooked myself a decent meal because I thought I deserved some good dinner after having slogged so hard for the past few days.
Is this loving oneself and loving life? I don't really know how to define those. All I know is I try to do anything that puts me at ease or makes me good these days, including walking an extra distance to snap a picture today. I don't want to think about matters that upset me, care about people who hurt me, and hold on so dearly to the things that will eventually leave me.
I just want to find some time soon, sit down on a couch and read a book while I enjoy my chocolate pretzels with a scorching hot soyabean drink that is 75% sweetened.
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