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Reality creeps in.

I think I'm not liking this feeling.
 
Of insecurity, anxiety, and maybe a little too much fear.
 
My mum will not working for two months. Somehow that scares me quite a bit because it probably means a lot less freedom, at the least the kind I want.
My brother's girlfriend has moved in her big pink creature (taller than my largest Doraemon) to my room when I was away. She put it right in front of my Doraemon toys, making them hard to find in my sight. It's as if she's telling me that she's starting to invade and asking me to watch out.
Suddenly, I find myself grasping. I'm finding it hard to imagine. Seemingly, my life in the very near future is likely to be unprecedentedly full of ups and downs. If everyone is afraid of the unknown, I think I am more scared of the known, for I don't have the slightest idea how I can evade what I don't want to face head-on.
 
And.
 
My application number has been removed from the list on the website.
 
I really thought I wouldn't be upset.
Oh well.

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I'll never understand.

Some people, you try to break them before you build them. Some people, you are only remembered by them when they need your help. Some people, you spend time trying to change them only to realise you were never someone who could impact their lives. Some people, they hurt you so much but you know, they are just not worth it. So, don't bother. ASPIRE 2010 was a screwed yet another learning experience for me this time. I'd really like to thank my fellow peers for going through shit with me. And thank goodness that I believe in miracles. You never know what happens until the last minute, really. I never felt so shagged, and devastated about people.

All the small things.

So blonde Neo came with a packet of sushi and my chrysanthemum tea and Mr. Bean's pancakes. We continued to gorge ourselves with cones (actually just 2) of Cornetto which I bought to reward myself after a long time of not having eaten ice cream. We studied and also watched The Family Court. I really feel sad for AhWU that everyones hates his Leshan role but I guess he's right that actors and actresses like to see audiences' reactions towards their acting. What a breakthrough for him! Had supper with Shirl and Eh Chris! at somewhere nearby. Continued to study with Angie and we (or rather I) had a bad night because she was coughing quite badly. Blonde Neo I tell you, you better start drinking bottles of water when you get home today. NO MORE CHIPS!!! I'm watching you.... So anyway, in the morning we had Mac breakfast and Angie FINALLY invited me to her house wheeeeeeeee. Happening hor? Meeting the climates (Auntie Rainbow, Sunshine boy and Rain) later to celebrate mid-aut...