I was attempting to check if the latest episode of my show has been uploaded when I realised that all China entertainment sites have ceased operation for the day, to mourn for the victims of the severe Zhou Qu mudslide. I feel ashamed of myself for not knowing till my sister mentioned just now. I checked out the statistics and they made my jaws drop. I recalled 邓姐's hometown is around that area and I quickly reached for my phone and dropped her a text to ask if everything is fine. I hope it is. While contending with my environment that's free from such geological hazards, I wish there is something I can do for the people there. There must still be a crowd of crying, panicking people searching for their loved ones despite the continuous torrential debris flows. This reminds me of an essay my brother wrote in p6. Any victim could be a stranger to us, but he could have been the only son of an old couple, the father of a small child, the supportive husband of a now-widowed woman, or the sole breadwinner of a family.
This CNY, I realised many things. I realised I have always envied families who go out as a whole for CNY visiting, or those who invite many relatives and friends over. I realised I am very afraid of the coming of CNY because CNY simply means watching movies and slacking at home for me. I love to watch movies, there is no doubt about that. Perhaps I just don't appreciate the latter because there is so much to face head-on. I hate the silence or otherwise awful hurlings at the dining table. I hate how I need to pretend to be hospitable to people I dislike. This year, I hid in my room when people I did not feel comfortable with came, then I was accused of being stubborn and impolite. Sometimes I really wonder if being myself is of imperative or being polite is. Whichever the case, I want to confess that I really feel tired and unhappy this CNY. The worst is that I feel that no one can understand because everyone I tried to rant this to tells me I should go home because it is CNY after...
唉，悲哀。。。人类是否要多加反省？问题到底出在哪里？
ReplyDeleteit reminds me of a reality programme i watched on animal attack. an elephant in the circus trumpeted intimidatingly, attacked the trainer, 'dribbled' the body around on the ground with it humongous leg. the horrifying image make us ponder why are these creatures so mean? until lately i saw another video which also has the same video of the animal attack but before this was another video of behind the scenes that showed the trainers torturing these animals... it's the same r/s betw. humans and the environment. :(
If you believe in Karma..(Im not trying to sound religious here :/)
ReplyDelete